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#4795 Dodano: 08-04-2011 15:12. Głosów: -2
Here are some handy tips to make sure your team hates you and your project runs into serious trouble:
Make sure you don’t give your team enough time to do the work, and then blame them for not getting it done on time.
Routinely ask people to stop working on whatever they’re doing right now to take care of urgent emergency work.
Then utterly fail to follow up on that urgent emergency work.
Never let anyone on your team release anything or even talk to a user without giving it to you to look over first.
When they give you that work, make sure you send it back with a whole lot of vague and poorly thought-out changes – but make sure you don’t give any extra time to make them.
In fact, try to constantly find many small changes that your team should make, just to keep them on their toes.
Your team needs constant attention! If it’s been more than two hours since you’ve talked to someone on your team, drop by and tap one of them on the shoulder and ask for an update.
All organizations run on status. If the status updates stop flowing, a company can crumble and perish! Also, developers feel lonely if they haven’t given a status update in the last few hours. So make sure everyone has to fill out elaborate status reports, and make sure you hold at least three two-hour-long status meetings every week.
Did someone on your team do something differently than how you would do it? Reprimand them! They might tell you that it works just fine, and that their way is just as good. But it’s not your way, so it’s not right.
Remember: reading your mind is part of every team member’s job. That’s how they stay proactive!
Most of all, though, remember rule #1: Nobody is ever allowed to make mistakes! If a developer makes a mistake, it reflects badly on you, and the whole team suffers. Never admit that you were wrong about anything. If you said it once, it’s now the law and should never be questioned.
<< |
>>
Make sure you don’t give your team enough time to do the work, and then blame them for not getting it done on time.
Routinely ask people to stop working on whatever they’re doing right now to take care of urgent emergency work.
Then utterly fail to follow up on that urgent emergency work.
Never let anyone on your team release anything or even talk to a user without giving it to you to look over first.
When they give you that work, make sure you send it back with a whole lot of vague and poorly thought-out changes – but make sure you don’t give any extra time to make them.
In fact, try to constantly find many small changes that your team should make, just to keep them on their toes.
Your team needs constant attention! If it’s been more than two hours since you’ve talked to someone on your team, drop by and tap one of them on the shoulder and ask for an update.
All organizations run on status. If the status updates stop flowing, a company can crumble and perish! Also, developers feel lonely if they haven’t given a status update in the last few hours. So make sure everyone has to fill out elaborate status reports, and make sure you hold at least three two-hour-long status meetings every week.
Did someone on your team do something differently than how you would do it? Reprimand them! They might tell you that it works just fine, and that their way is just as good. But it’s not your way, so it’s not right.
Remember: reading your mind is part of every team member’s job. That’s how they stay proactive!
Most of all, though, remember rule #1: Nobody is ever allowed to make mistakes! If a developer makes a mistake, it reflects badly on you, and the whole team suffers. Never admit that you were wrong about anything. If you said it once, it’s now the law and should never be questioned.